As writers, we manage to separate the non-important from the important elements in our lives. I try to mentally houseclean as I make my way through life, and often certain choices stay with me. For one, I need a certain amount of solitude in my life now. Maybe because I fully appreciate it now. I think all dreamers have that in common.
Another thing I choose is to put my family at the top of the list. I don’t care where I’m at or what I’m doing, if one of them calls, I’m 100 percent in the moment and listening. Since my girls are grown, I don’t have the carpooling in my life now, but I love play days and surprising the grandkids in the carpool lane. I enjoy making plans with my daughters, and spending a day shopping or running errands. Those are the best times, and vital to my well-being as a woman and as a writer. It keeps me in my flow on all levels. And special friends are also an added celebration.
Mixed in the above is dreams that come from my heart. My work; stories I envision writing, and the one I’m writing now. These I carry with me in that special space where dreams are made. I’ve always believed that if a person isn’t grounded in some vital way to them, everything else will be out of balance. How could it not? Just as we choose the things we allow in our space, we’re responsible for our own happiness.
I’m going to tell you how choices can make a huge difference; taken from the book of my life. When I worked in an admin. office, years ago, my job was working figures aka billing. This job was on the other end of the spectrum for me since math gives me hives! It did provide a much needed insurance coverage and good wage, serving a purpose in our lives. But one day, after about ten years, I discovered a way to change that. A good thing, since I was putting some long hours into my craft, and burning the candle at both ends. Once I made a conscious decision that my writing came first, everything fell into place. I made a call to the local library, and talked with a friend there who was in charge of hiring the circulation staff. I didn’t know at the time it was part of her job, but thrilled to find out. I asked her if there were any positions available. Amazingly, she needed someone for thirty-some hours, I wanted 20 or less and that’s when my world changed. I got that job, and the schedule that worked best for me. The relief was amazing. My husband was then offered a better insurance carrier from his boss, and my creative life took a turn. Sure the money was less, but that’s never been the motivating factor in my life. The library was much closer to home, and I spent more time writing novels than punching the time clock. I loved it! I learned a very valuable lesson in this experience; we navigate our own ships. That’s when I fell in love with the possibilites behind the scenes, serendipity, and the bigger picture. Or the FLOW that I’m so fond of saying.
My wish for the New Year is that everyone will consciously choose the things they allow into their space. I believe that creative people know how vital this is. What choice has benefited you as writer this year? Did you throw anything out, or add something?
LaD, you have a knack for boiling down the more vital things in life. Whenever I read your posts I feel connected to my writing choices, so thanks for that.
This past year has been a series of downs, and strangely, I learned much about myself, which produced a couple of choices. One was to skip next semester, and the second was to revisit my first manuscript. I’m not planning a rewrite, but its characters produced some ideas for a new story. Both cause me to look forward to the upcoming year.
LaDonna, I love your wish for the new year.
I’m glad my posts are resounding with you, Kathy! I never know what topic I’m going to blog about, but something always manages to call me and I stick with that one.
I hope your New Year choices bring you joy. I always look forward the winter months ahead as the perfect time to reconnect to story. The holidays distract me like a shiny ornament, and like a child I follow the glow! LOL
Hey Cindy, thank you! I suspect that you discovered that wish long ago. Whatever you’re doing, it seems to be working too.
Everything you said is so true about choosing our paths. I love your story about changing jobs. I’ve been there, quitting a job that I felt was killing pieces of my soul. And it wasn’t a horrible job. But it was hours I wasn’t doing what I wanted to do. I wanted to write. Now I am.
I stop writing for family, too. I have to admit that if I had my son at home, I might not stop every time he calls. It gets more precious when you don’t see them every day.
“I’ve been there, quitting a job that I felt was killing pieces of my soul. And it wasn’t a horrible job. But it was hours I wasn’t doing what I wanted to do. I wanted to write. Now I am.” ~Edie~
Edie, exactly how I felt! And I remember writing with kids at home, and I agree about how it’s so much different now. I wrote in chaos some days, and probably why the sweet smell of solitude is so precious.
And I hadn’t intended my blog to be so long, and added the work story later. I thought it reflected what I was saying so perfectly, and wanted to share.
This has totally been the story of my life this year. Writing is my first priority, and anything that makes that difficult gets cut.
Spy, I smile when I think of you!
You’ve definitely found your bliss and it inspires us all. Your analogy is perfect too: “Writing is my first priority, and anything that makes that difficult gets cut.” ~Natasha~
Writing isn’t my first priority. Unfortuntely health has to take presedence. It certainly makes you take stock of what’s important in life. Yes, I’ve managed to block out time to write but it isn’t easy. Family will always come first, the steady income of the day job has to be high on the list and friends will always be in the top five.
I hope to someday cut back on the day job to part time so as to eke out more writing time. But that’s something in the future. Probably not the near future.
I totally agree with you, Liz! You must make your health a priority so you can fully heal. And I love seeing how many do put the family first. That’s my foundation that I navigate from too.
Good luck on finding that perfect work schedule. There’s always a way, I believe.
Writing is important to me on so many levels. Sometimes I must sacrifice time with family and friends to meet deadlines. what i really need to do is manage my writing time better so i don’t have to sacrifice!
LaD, I’ve tried to embrace this last year of my son only being in school 2 days a week, and have tried to do things with him on the days we are together. Next year, he’s in school full time, and I didn’t want to waste this year. At the same time, my writing career kicked up a notch, and it has been a balancing act. The best we can do it keep the balance healthy.
“The best we can do it keep the balance healthy.” ~Michelle~
Michelle, you nailed it girl! I so admire the way you love your children, yet keep that special part of You alive. It’s the best gift we can give our loved ones; happiness and balance.
Karin, what I’ve learned from you is that you can have it all. Maybe it gets crazy, but at the core you’re available to your family and have an amazing career. And BTW, congrats on your fabulous sale too!
Can’t wait to read that trilogy, I tell ya!