Congratulations to Catherine Chant, the winner of CADE by Margery Scott!
A big welcome to Margery Scott, whose western romances are fast becoming favorites of readers. And thanks to Margery for sharing much needed marital advice!
My hubby and I celebrated our 46th wedding anniversary last week. That is a LONG time!! And considering even our closest friends didn’t think we’d last a year, it’s pretty remarkable. Now, people constantly ask us how we’ve managed to stay married for so long. Our favorite response? “We’re both stubborn. Neither one of us was willing to admit defeat.” 🙂
I read somewhere that a reporter asked a couple who’d been married 65 years how they’d stayed married. The woman replied, “We were born in a time when if something was broken, we would fix it. Not throw it away.”
Hubby and I were born in that time, too, and believe me, there were times when both of us were tempted to either get a divorce or commit murder 🙂 Murder is easier and cheaper, but I don’t like orange jumpsuits 🙂 So we stuck it out, fought it out, and fixed what was broken.
I thought I’d share five tips for staying together without killing each other.
1.People always say “Don’t go to bed mad.” That may work sometimes, but it might mean losing a lot of sleep while you hash out whatever the problem is. The thing is, often by morning, you’ll realize how silly the argument was in the first place. And daytime make-up sex can be a really fun way to spice up your lovemaking 🙂
2. Do things together. Hubby and I don’t really enjoy doing most of the same things, but we compromise. I go out in the boat (okay, I do always have a book with me) and ooh and ahh over the fish he’s landed, I let him win at Scrabble, and I watch sports (again with a book 🙂 ). He, on the other hand, wanders around historical sites with me while I research, goes to dances and parties with me, and socializes as much as his introverted self can manage.
3. Conversely, do things apart. Spending 24/7 with your spouse just isn’t healthy. You need to have your own interests, follow your own dreams, and have a your own life. And after a kazillion years of marriage and you know everything there is to know about your spouse, you’ll need something to talk about.
4. Pick your battles. Think about the things your partner does that are really irritating, and then think about how you’d feel if he wasn’t there. Sure, there might not be socks on the floor or crumbs on the counter, but I bet you’d be willing to trade anything just to have him back, bad habits and all.
5. Remember why you fell in love with him in the first place. Some days, that’s really hard to do, but it’ll get you through some of the tough times that are inevitable in any long-term relationship.
There are lots of other tips I could share, but these are a good start.
Those of you who are in a relationship, what’s your top tip for keeping it healthy and happy?
I’m giving away a digital copy of Cade’s story, the first book in the The Morgans of Rocky Ridge series of novellas, to a commenter.
When revenge leads Cade Morgan to hold up a stagecoach and kidnap his childhood friend, Isabella Morrow, he discovers his feelings for her are stronger than ever. He suspects Bella feels the same way, so why is she intent on marrying another man? And what kind of future can he offer her now that he’s wanted by the law?
Thanks so much for inviting me today.