Guest blogger Zoe Winters
December 2nd, 2008 by Edie Ramer
Keep Your Eye on the Ball
I’m 29 and I’ve had 33 jobs. Some of these jobs I quit because I had panic attacks and couldn’t stand being stuck at a job where I was trapped for however many hours. And some of these jobs I quit because I don’t do well with authority.
I’m not sure how noble that is. Probably not very. I learned very early that I couldn’t run in other people’s hamster wheels. This set up in me a feeling that I couldn’t do anything. I couldn’t keep a job; I couldn’t take care of myself, etc.
I thought I was lazy, I must be to quit all those jobs. At the very least I had no work ethic. And then I started a small business. Wedding Coordinating. I liked it a lot, but in the background in my head, I wanted to make money with the wedding stuff, so I could write.
Everything came down to: So I could write. Being my first business, I made several mistakes that I’ve since learned from. (Of course I’m making new mistakes now, so it never really ends, haha!)
But one thing I learned was that I wasn’t lazy. In fact, where before it was hard for me to keep a part time job, now I was working 10 hours a day most days.
I’m not sure what it is about people who can’t work for other people, but we aren’t like everybody else. I’m not saying we’re better or special. In fact, a strong argument could be made that we’re crazy. But I’ve got this wild independent streak and for better or worse, I have to do things my way.
Somehow this has creeped into writing. Just like I couldn’t keep a job working for anyone else, I couldn’t seem to make myself work inside the normal system of publishing.
I spent 4 years fighting with myself on the issue. I knew all the wisdom. If I was good enough, I would find an agent and a publisher. But how could I do that, if I couldn’t buckle down and send out enough agent queries? If my search was only half-hearted?
I saw indie publishing as a massive challenge. A challenge big enough to keep my anal retentive little self happily obsessing about the most banal details. I amassed over $150 worth of self publishing books before I decided to take the plunge and start the business I probably should have started to begin with. Not because there is a lot of money in it, but because it is where my passion lies.
I kept reading books about marketing and distribution and all these different facets of publishing and I wanted to get in there and try it. Succeed or fail I wanted to play the game myself and see what happened.
But I kept waffling. My agent queries got even more half-hearted. My writing grinded to a halt. I became a complete emo on my blog. (Something I still haven’t totally broken myself of.)
It was important to me to still be in the “writer club” and if I deviated from that to forge my own path, what would that mean? I’m still trying to figure that out. I’m trying not to see things as “us vs. them” (trad publishing vs. indie publishing). And some days I really screw that up.
The biggest take-home lesson of the past couple of days is that I have to keep my eye on the ball. Some people will support what I’m doing and some people won’t, but I can’t have a chip on my shoulder and let that pollute how I interact with other people. I have to keep my eye on the actual goal.
I think sometimes as writers we find ourselves getting very distracted with what others think of us. Whether we’re in the club or not. Are we doing things right? Are we acceptable?
We forget that we’re ultimately in this to connect with end readers because we’re so enmeshed in this writing subculture. A subculture both very supportive at times, and very clawing and grasping competitive at times. Sometimes it’s a blessing and sometimes it’s a curse. Other writers are the only other people who really truly “get us,” but sometimes we get too wrapped up in this or that drama.
So this is me saying, in the past couple of weeks I’ve taken my eye off the ball and gone slightly emo and insane. Because I can control every single aspect of my own work now, but I cannot control things outside of my sphere of control.
Do you sometimes take your eye off the ball and get distracted from your goal?
Zoe Winters is an indie author of paranormal romance. Her novella, KEPT, was recently released as a free ebook. You can download your copy here. If you like it, be sure to let her know, and don’t forget to sign up for her monthly newsletter for updates of new releases, freebies, and contests.
26 Responses to “Guest blogger Zoe Winters”
Zoe, I just want to offer you all the best in this venture. I hope you suceed beyond your wildest dreams!
And yes, I get distracted. Sometimes I have to take a big step back, re-assess and then get back on track.
Zoe, thank you for your great blog! I haven’t worked 33 jobs, but I’ve quit my share. I work well with others, but I felt like these jobs were killing pieces of my soul. They weren’t what I wanted to do. I wanted to tell my stories.
There isn’t one way to be a published writer anymore, there are several ways. There’s no bad and there’s no good. It’s just what’s the best way for you. I’m glad you found your own way and you are brave enough to go after it. I hope you become a HUGE success!
Zoe, we all take our eye off the ball at times. The important thing is find it again, whatever “it” means to you.
I’ve had several jobs in the past, and my only focus at that time was the paycheck would keep me in paper and equipment to do “my work.” Oh, and the grocery thing too.
The road is long, but look at how many roadsigns along the way there are. It’s a pick and choose game for everyone.
Best of luck to you, and your venture Zoe! You deserve all the good stuff!
I also wanted to offer you my wishes of good luck. People have to always follow their dreams in this world. Without dreams–well, life wouldn’t be very exciting.
Hi Michelle, Thanks! I think that’s all of us sometimes.
Thanks, Edie!
Thanks, LaDonna! There are a lot of choices along the way.
Hey Cindy, very true! Thanks!
Still love that cover, Zoe.
All right, enough of that. Back to your own blog, slacker!
Hey Ferrel, thanks! The cover is starting to grow on me. At first I thought it was too busy, but people I emailed liked it better than the other options, so I went with it.
Didn’t you know I was a subgenius? Slack is our religion.
Great post, Z!
I think it’s extraordinarily easy to take your eyes off the ball. But as you say, reaching end readers is what’s truly important. You’ve done a great job of that.
Hey, Kel, I’ve barely gotten started, but thanks!
I just adore that you’ve quit 33 jobs. I want to write a book about a character like that, LOL! Finding your own way is important; you’ve only got one life to live.
PS: Frank Sinatra is singing on the stereo, so reading this made me think of his song, “I Did It My Way.” That should be your theme song!
LMAO, Spy! Only you would see that as a recommendation in my favor! hahahaha
And nice theme song! I have a lot of Sinatra. Me and Tom are big fans of that type of music. We also went to see one of the last Jazz Greats, Dave Brubeck on his farewell tour (I THINK it was his last one. If he’s still playing I’m just a big moron haha.)
Ooh Dave Brubeck rocks. I still heart Take Five.
Sometimes we lose a bit of focus but you always get back on that horse and remember how your heart was in it from the start. I started your book last night and I had to put it down or else I would have never gotten any sleep (you know, that one more chapter deal? I kept doing it lol). Based on your award winning short story (hehe, we can say that now) and this book, girl you’ve got the goods! And your cover is awesome because everything fits from the story.
Keep on keeping on and don’t mind the naysayers. Just remember what works for you and adjust accordingly.
Ooh, my spam word is listen. So take the spaminator’s advice and Listen to your heart.
Hey Rae, I know! Everybody has heard Take Five, even if they don’t know they’ve heard it, haha.
And one of my good friends recently had a baby. She named him Miles. Which cracks me up, cause he’s a three month old baby named Miles! He’ll grow into that name and it’ll be super cool, but while he’s little it’s just going to be funny.
bwahahaha at “my award winning short story” That makes me sound so much cooler than I am!
Hehe, and my spam word is “island” as in “no man is a” We’ve all got to find our tribe that gives us the support we need to keep on trucking!
And thanks, I’m glad you’re enjoying KEPT!
All the time. The ball bounces out of my sights every time I got to work at my 5th job. At least, I think it’s my fifth, if you include my job at the library in high school.
It’s the one that pays that bills and it’s not half bad.
But I admire people who follow their dreams. We let too many of them slip by as it is. Here’s to hoping you much success on your publication road.
Hey Marcia! I never worked in a library. Congrats on only having 5 jobs, haha!
Once I got to about job 24, we started keeping a list.
And thanks!
Zoe, I never played well with others in the business world, mostly because the people who were supposed to know what they were doing were morons. So I started my own business when I was 25. My husband worked long ass hours, and we had three kids one of which was only 5 months old at the time. 22 years later we added a fourth kid, and the biz is still going, and it has made it possible for me to follow my dream career as a writer. While I do get distracted now and then, for me I really can’t afford to get *too* distracted. Too many people depend on me for too many things. Sometimes the pressure is huge, but well, I thrive under pressure. So I’m raising my coffee cup to you and your entrepreneurial spirit! may it live on and thrive!
Hey Karin! I’m glad that you have a business that’s working for you! What kind of business is it?
I grew up watching one side of my family running their own businesses and the other side “working for the man” as it were, haha. And I think it was hereditary.
It can be a lot of pressure and sometimes I spaz out when I’ve got a lot of things to get done in a short amount of time, but oddly I am much “less” spazzy doing this kind of thing, than I was working behind a counter. I guess because if I get totally stressed I can go take a nap. There’s just no nap time at normal jobs! haha!
And thanks!
Dare I admit that I’ve been at the same day job for 20 years? I told my boss when I started that when it stopped being fun, I was outta there. Apparently it must still be fun, because I’m still there.
I agree with Edie. There is no one right way to publication. Some writers feel that only going with the big boys is being “truly” published, while others will go the eformat route or the indie route. End result … you’re a published author.
Terrific blog. Thanx for joining us here at MM and the best of luck to you and your endeavours.
Holy Crap, Liz! The same job for 20 years? That makes me want to hide under the bed, lol. You must really like it there.
Thanks, Liz. And you are on my list. I should have been buying up the books of all my blogging buddies a long time ago, but I spent a whole year not buying anything at all. It was an experiment to get my spending in check.
Can’t say I blame you there, Zoe. I’d love to get my spending under control but someone has to jumpstart the economy.
How’s that for justification? I can control myself for most things, but books? I have a hard time whenever I see a favorite author. Gotta have that book.
hehehe “Liz Kreger, superhero shopper.”
Now you just need a cape!
I’m always late coming to the party because I am trying to keep my eye on the ball, Zoe, can’t wait to read KEPT. Well done and great blog!
hehe Donnell, awesome!
And thanks! I hope you like it!
(Lots of exclamation points haha, whee)